Five Ways to Get Through the Unthinkable with Dr. Nicole Price
When Vonda was editing last week's interview with Dr. Nicole Price, one segment was so good she cut it out on purpose — to save it for its own episode. This is that episode. Over coffee (Vonda's from her new birthday Nespresso, Lori's from an old pot in a Christmas mug), the hosts unpack the book Lori can't stop highlighting: Dr. Price's filter-free guide to getting through the unthinkable, and the five steps inside it that every flower shop owner can use right now.
A book with a title that scares people off
Fair warning, which the hosts give too: the book is called The Holy Educated Motherf*cker: A Filter-Free Guide to Getting Through the Unthinkable, and Vonda admits she almost couldn't get past the title — that word still "stabs" her generation. But Dr. Price wrote it during the pandemic, when her world as a traveling consultant and speaker shut down overnight and she decided to simply tell her story. Lori met her through a group of white women and women of color building relationships and learning from one another — a friendship she calls one of the blessings of the pandemic — and says the book made her feel that no matter her mistakes and tragedies, she can still do whatever she desires to do.
Business leaders have lives, too
In the saved clip, Dr. Price explains why she considers this her best work: for once she wasn't writing to business leaders about their work, but about their lives. Owners have to show up when they're grieving, mid-divorce, or heartbroken, because people depend on them — and a global pandemic is about as unthinkable as it gets. Then she lands the line that made everyone reach for a pen, borrowed from Elisabeth Kubler-Ross by way of her own grandmother: beautiful people don't just happen. Depth, substance, and resolve come from the midnight fire calls and the losses — the very moments, she points out, that florists help people get through.
The five ways to get through the unthinkable
Dr. Price defines the unthinkable as a situation too unlikely or undesirable to even be considered a possibility. For a shop owner, fill in your own blank: not enough employees to get the orders out, the September cash-flow pit, or a fall calendar full of all-white weddings when white flowers are impossible to find. Her five steps, as Lori and Vonda work through them:
1. Tap into your spiritual connection — be holy. Whatever brings you calm — prayer, quiet meditation, stillness — get your mind, body, and soul there first.
2. Lean on the solid places of your personality, not the holes. In a crisis, rely on your strengths. If numbers aren't your gift and cash flow is the fire, hire someone who lives in spreadsheets — mid-crisis is not the moment to learn a new skill.
3. Draw from the totality of your experiences — be educated. Look at the big picture: you survived this same cash-flow cycle last year, and the year before. Go back to your notes. You did it then; you'll do it again. And keep educating yourself in your craft, because knowledge is power — no four-year degree required.
4. Be courageous if you need to. Put on your big-girl (or big-boy) pants and decide: this will not beat me. Wallowing is easier, which is exactly why it's a habit to break. Lori compares Vonda's version of this to the Monty Python knight — "it's just a flesh wound," keep fighting.
5. Pull out the fight if you need to. Sometimes solving the problem means letting yourself get a little mad. That repressed fighting spirit is still in there; the unthinkable is when you use it.
Five minutes of "poor me"
Vonda adds a rule from her own mother that pairs perfectly with the list: you get five minutes a day for a pity party. Feel it fully, then get out and get moving. You don't have to know how you'll get out of your unthinkable — you just have to know it isn't the end.
Key takeaways
- Name your current "unthinkable" — staffing, cash flow, flower shortages — then walk it through the five steps instead of spiraling.
- Hire for your weaknesses during a crisis; lean only on your strengths.
- Your own history is evidence: check last year's notes and remember you've survived this season before.
- Limit self-pity to five minutes a day, then re-engage your fighting spirit.
- Beautiful people don't just happen — the hard seasons are what build depth, character, and the ability to show up for others.