The Four Most Important Attributes in a Good Boss
After a month of interviews for their "Who's the Boss?" summer series — Teleflora's Michael Martin on leadership, husband-and-wife team Beth and Dwain, next-generation owners Derek and Holly, and Abby Chick with her silent partner — Vonda and Lori sit down to connect the dots. Four very different ownership setups, yet the same attributes kept showing up in every single one. This recap episode pulls them together into a practical checklist for anyone who leads a team.
It all starts with respect
Vonda's big realization looking across all four interviews: the common denominator was respect. Abby respecting her partner, Derek respecting his mother, Beth and Dwain respecting each other, and Michael Martin respecting everyone who works for him. His line stuck with Lori for weeks: every employee is a great worker — you may just have them in the wrong place. In small and mid-sized shops where everyone wears multiple hats, that means framing tasks honestly: "I know answering phones isn't your wheelhouse — can you cover it for one hour?" Set the expectation, keep it short, and even your introverted designer will help willingly.
Listen — really listen
The first attribute of a good boss is true listening, and both hosts admit it's a discipline, not a gift. Lori shares a quote she found in Fortune: of all the leadership skills, listening is the most valuable and least understood — ordinary leaders listen sometimes, but the great ones never stop, which is how they hear about problems and opportunities before anyone else. The keys: listen without feeling threatened (or your team stops being honest with you), stay open to perspectives that don't match your vision, and resist jumping straight to solving. Sometimes people just need to vent safely — as the hosts' favorite comedy video, It's Not About the Nail, hilariously proves.
Communicate — don't dictate
Attribute two: communication is a two-way street, and barking orders isn't it. The hosts contrast the dictator boss ("You're answering phones for the next hour, I don't care") with the communicator ("Could you answer phones for an hour? It would really help us out"). Same request, wildly different response — because adults want to be part of the team, not ordered around. Derek and Holly modeled it beautifully: before changing anything at the family shop, Derek asked his parents why things were done that way.
Humility and trust
From an article on being a boss people love working for (not a Michael Scott "World's Best Boss" mug situation), Lori pulls a definition worth writing down: humility is confidence plus vulnerability. It lets a leader toot the team's horn instead of their own, and as the hosts recall from an emotional intelligence book talk at SAF, humility signals emotional maturity while arrogance usually signals insecurity.
Then there's trust, which ran through every interview. Vonda's parents put it best when she was a teenager: "I will trust you until you give me a reason not to." Start there with employees. But the hosts draw a crucial distinction: losing trust because someone lied to you is fundamentally different from losing confidence because someone isn't designing the way you'd like — the second one is coachable. Control and distrust go hand in hand; releasing control is how trust grows on both sides.
Lead yourself, then own it
You can't lead a team toward goals you're not holding yourself to. Lori tells a story on herself: with two toddlers 15 months apart, she'd yell at them to stop yelling — until a bout of laryngitis forced her to whisper, and the kids instantly went quiet and whispered back. The example you set is the behavior you get, at home and in the shop.
The final attribute: own it. The buck stops with you. When there's an angry customer, good leaders like Derek and Abby take responsibility and work the solution first — figuring out who took the call or made the design comes later, if at all. As the article Lori quotes puts it, leaders inspire accountability through their ability to accept responsibility before they place blame.
Key takeaways
- Respect is the foundation — and often "bad employees" are good people in the wrong position.
- Great leaders never stop listening; sometimes your team needs venting space, not solutions.
- Communicate requests, don't dictate orders — the phrasing changes everything.
- Humility is confidence plus vulnerability; trust people until they give you a reason not to.
- Lead yourself first, and accept responsibility before you place blame.