The Hidden Impact of People in Your Life (and Your Business)
Vonda is flying solo this week — Lori is in Ohio soaking up the first days with her brand-new grandson, Boone — and what starts as a story about a weekend of yard work turns into one of the most personal episodes in a while. Twenty impulse-bought plants deep into her garden project, Vonda found herself using a heavy-duty cart from Ed, the neighbor who was already there when she moved in ten years ago: a master gardener, bonsai grower, and ex-military widower in his late 80s. Every planting decision — which grass seed for shade versus sun, how to shape the trees out front — traced back to something Ed taught her. And that pulled up a lyric from one of her favorite musicals, Wicked: people come into our lives for a reason, bringing something we must learn — and we are led to those who help us most to grow, if we let them.
The mentors who pushed (and why it stung)
Vonda asks listeners to think about the people they've worked with or for: were they placed in your life for a reason? Early in her career as a designer in Ames, Iowa, she had a great mentor, Peggy, who kindly and consistently encouraged her to pick up the pace and better herself — and every single time, Vonda cried. Not because the delivery was harsh; it wasn't. She felt she was doing a good job, never wanted to disappoint, and being pushed felt like not being good enough. Looking back, she's thankful she kept being challenged. Her question for you: who is your life challenger, and was their approach positive or negative? Later, a wholesaler named Jim at Florists Distributing in Des Moines noticed her thirst for knowledge and invited her to assist the designers at a holiday open house — free labor, sure, but he could have asked anybody, and he asked her. Those designers nudged her toward certification, which became her road to AIFD, where she met some of her closest friends. As the membership chair told her at the time: this is your license to learn. Her take on the letters, with respect to great uncertified designers everywhere: it's not about the letters, it's about the standard.
The employees who taught the hard lessons
Not every person arrives bearing gifts you'd choose. In Vonda's shop — nearly 20 years of employees, drivers, designers, and customers — a trusted designer-friend, her daughter, and eventually her volunteering mother became almost extended family. But underneath the friendly surface, the three had quietly become the ones in charge, and the other two employees felt shut out. Vonda had no idea until one of her shyest workers finally spoke up. The lesson: keep opening your heart and your shop to people, but be more observant of your other employees' reactions — what's said, and sometimes more importantly, what's not said. Another designer had exceptional skills and speed but tried to run the flower room, undermining and belittling coworkers. After multiple warnings, Vonda had to let her go — the first time she ever asked someone to pack up their things and walked them to the door. She needed that designer's production, badly. But keeping her would have risked losing the rest of the team. Vonda has watched Flower Clique members wrestle with the same call right before a holiday — hoping to just survive the season with a problem employee — and when they finally make the move, the rest of the team rallies. If someone is causing an undercurrent before the holiday, the holiday will only make it worse.
Drivers, customers, and the ones who spread joy
Then there was Kenny, the retired cement-truck driver whose wife had passed — the shop became his family. Customers would call just to say the driver who delivered their flowers gave them as much joy as the arrangement. If you find an employee like that, hold on to them (though maybe not, Vonda admits, until they've backed into the same mailbox twice). Customers cut both ways too: the cheerleaders in your community who post about you and tell everyone will help you achieve greatness — while the chronic complainers wear you and your team down. Keep the ones who lift you up, and quietly, slowly let the others go.
It's all shaping who you're becoming
Vonda closes on the personal side: her spiritual director once told her that we're given signs to reassure and prepare us — the lesson, time and again, is to listen to the whisper and watch with wonder. Almost no one gets through life without something hard, and every difficulty — the walk-off during a holiday, the firing you dreaded, the customer who said it was the most beautiful arrangement they'd ever received, the last tribute you built for a dear friend — has helped shape you. The situations you handled over the last few years prepped you for the decisions you're making today. And the ones you're handling today are making you stronger for what's ahead.
Key takeaways
- Think about who challenged you and how it was delivered — then be that encouraging (not crushing) voice for your own team.
- Watch for undercurrents: observe how every employee reacts to shop dynamics, including what's not being said.
- Keeping a toxic high-performer through a holiday usually costs more than letting them go — and the team tends to rally afterward.
- A driver or front-line employee who spreads joy is part of your brand; treasure them.
- Nurture cheerleader customers and quietly release the chronic complainers who drain your team.